The Weekend I Didn't Have

Feeling sluggish this weekend, I was looking forward to sedentary activities. I feel badly (or guilty--pick one) about how little I've been able to devote to the online art class, so I've been really looking forward to my first weekend off in a couple of weeks in order to paint and piddle.

The weather is even appropriate: it's been overcast for a few days now. Yesterday was even rather chilly. I hate leaving the house in weather like that so guess what I did? Went to a soccer game. Now, I am not sports minded IN THE LEAST, but because I birthed a child who now plays soccer (thank you daddy for signing her up), I received the unasked for blessing of attending soccer games on Saturday mornings. Oh joy. Oh delight. Watch me click my heels while gnashing my teeth. Did I mention it was drizzly and cold? I guess it was worth all that misery to watch my girl kick at least one goal. (She said grudgingly.)

Today I had an inner debate going as to whether or not I should skip church. I just felt my weekend had gypped me. I'd had all these plans to chill--paint, read, watch movies--and instead, I felt obligated to do all the stuff I "ought" to do. Like go to the grocery, play hide and seek with my little girl, go to a soccer game, get the tax stuff together, wash clothes and put them away... so by Sunday, I was sick of doing stuff because I "ought" to. Besides, I think church should be something you desire to do because you enjoy it and are blessed by it, not because you feel guilty if you don't go. (Yeah, I'm still working on that.) So I didn't go. But I didn't paint either, which was high on my priority list. I've spent the bulk of my day on the tax stuff, keeping tabs on my girl (which includes hide and seek) and taking far too long to book a hotel room for my hubby who's going to a conference this weekend.

I've really struggled with the juggling. Juggling all the things that make up who I am. All these parts of me demand time. The majority of my time is spent being a wife, mother and business owner. It feels all my time is taken up with those three parts of me and there's little time left to devote to the artist, runner, avid reader and friend who also reside in my body. I guess the most frustrating thing is when I do set aside time for the artist et al, that time is stolen by the other major parts of me. The default parts.

I don't know the answer. That, in itself, frustrates me as a Type A firstborn who is all about solving problems and telling people what they "need" to do. But I'll tell you one thing:

It's enough to make me want to kick a soccer ball into the next county.

It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World

I swore (again) that December would not be this way.

This year will be different. I'll plan ahead, not plan too much, and have a restful un-stressful Christmas season.

Yeah.

As the first weekend in December comes rushing towards me, I find myself scrambling to have my girl at a Dr.'s appointment I forgot I made (thank God I put it in my phone to alert me, otherwise...), frantically finding a babysitter for a choir concert I've been planning to attend for a couple of months that snuck up on me, and half-dreading Saturday which will be a whirlwind of activity as I work at the salon, thus missing my girl's gymnastic presentation, then getting ready (quickly) to drive an hour for the salon's Christmas party that evening. (Gotta double check about THAT babysitter, too.)

Furthermore...

The girl's at the salon want to "dress up".

I am not a grown up person and therefore do not own dress-up clothes.

I could wear my tu-tu, striped scarf and army boots, but somehow I don't think that's what they mean.

Darn. Cause that sounds really cute.

Unfortunately, I don't own any of those items either, so I have to go shopping either way.

Double darn.

I don't have time to go shopping and may actually have to shop from my own closet. It's my least favorite place to shop. The selection is terrible and the return policy is non- existent.

I've also been test driving cars. Well, I've driven two. I was going to drive a few more today, but I'm not sure I have time now.

Unless they'll let me run errands in it today. I could go get groceries in the Volvo XC90, and go shopping in the Nissan Murano.

I call it multi-tasking.

Uh-Oh

Seems like my multi-tasking might not be such a good idea.

Offbeat Mulit-tasking

So, I'm driving to work this morning thinking about going to get a latte at my favorite coffee shop to assuage the nagging headache I have and I'm talking to my sister on the phone.

I pass a log truck. (I hate being behind those things- I just envision one of those logs sliding off into the car with me. *shudder*) The guy in the log truck beeps his horn and I check my rear view mirror slyly. Is he flirting? He points to my truck. I coolly don't acknowledge him just in case he's flirting. Then my brain kicks in and I remember how one of my back tires is tending to flatten occasionally.

Nixing the coffee idea, I cruise in to work, parking in a parking lot about a block away. (Don't get me started on the lack of parking near my work or the fact that I would have to rent a parking space in the parking lot AT my work. It gets ugly fast when I think about that.)
Fortunately, my forward thinking husband recently bought an air compressor (I think that's what is: you plug it into the cigarette lighter and it blows air.) for such a time as this. I plug it in and attach it to my tire and wait. It usually takes 10 minutes or so to pump up the tire. I hate standing around twiddling my thumbs- I'm all about doing something while I'm doing something- so I grab my knitting. So there I am. The truck door is open, I'm standing next to the truck knitting with this air thing whining in my ear watching it occasionally to make sure I don't get caught up in my knitting and pop a tire.

Yep.
Definitely offbeat.

Or maybe I'm just "off".