Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Love and Loss

This has been a hard year for us where cats are concerned.

Last fall, we began putting our cats outside. One of the cats thanked us by promptly leaving. For good. That's always hard because there's no closure. Did the cat go somewhere and die? Get hit by a car? Take up with someone else? I'll never know what happened to my beautiful golden eyed, silver Monaco. But it seems appropriate that, just as she walked into our lives 14 years before, she would walk out as well.

We got Monet as a kitten, and not too long afterwards, were given her half brother, Tiger. Monet was the "alpha" cat, not only bossing around the other cats, but us, as well. A couple of months ago, a pack of three dogs came through my yard and killed my girl.
Last year, a white cat started skulking around and helping himself to my cat's food. He was very skittish and I was torn between chasing him off and trying to tame him. Guess which won out? I put food out for him so he'd leave my cat's food alone and began the slow process of taming him. Turns out he was a huge mushpot who, while he never let me pick him up, sure did love being petted. Earlier this year, he got sick and a couple of days later died of an unknown cause.

Tiger was just happy to be here. Content to sleep and eat, he did nothing to rock the boat, but he sure didn't appreciate anyone rocking his boat. Once he got comfortable (wherever that was) he didn't want to be messed with, thank you. Unless it was time to eat. Again. That's why, last Saturday, I knew something was wrong when he turned up his nose at his breakfast. I immediately took him to the vet. After a week of tests and finding what was NOT wrong, we realized there was nothing more that could be done and made the difficult decision to euthanize him.

So now, we have gone from 4 cats, to 1 in rather short order. God knew exactly what I would need when he had me pluck a "black sock" from the middle of a busy highway a year ago. My little tripod legged Coco is just a year old and full of love, affection and playfulness.

A balm to my grieved heart.


Mary said...

I am sorry! As a lifetime cat lover and owner of several I know what you are feeling.


Renee said...

What a sweet reflection you've shared of the gifts of, what we in my home call, "kitten-children." Indeed, cats are precious, loved, and missed when they've gone. Grieving with y'all.

Sugar & spice said...

your background is so cute!!! and so are your cats!!!

~Molly~ said...

I am heartbroken for you!! They were beautiful kitties.

When I was a kid we lost several cats to accidents, dogs, disease, and I vowed that as an adult all my furbabies would be indoor-only. One of my favorite sweet babies was killed by a chow right in front of me when I was 8 years old. A few more were hit by cars and our beautiful siamese just never came home. I won't put my kids through that. We currently have 7 indoor kitties but our oldest is sickly. She's 14 and probably has breast cancer.

My prayers are with you!


spidermomrootswriter said...

Ahhh, Angela...having known you through all of the cats, it makes my heart sad to read this post. I'm sorry it's been such a challenging cat year! But one cat year is worth 9 other years, so you've been truly blessed. (This, as you no doubt realize, is a little-known theory core to the concept known as "modern math.) After we gradually lost Tigger, then Butterscotch (one of your cats' brother, cannot remember which) and finally Cosmic Creepers (yup, from Bedknobs & Broomsticks), we discovered we had borne enough kitty loss for a little while. Cheers to your dear Coco! Hopefully he'll be as much a blessing to you as our Coco has been to us (Joanne, Barry's Mom, is known as Coco in our family. Sending love & hugs to all 4 of you.

InTheFastLane said...

That is so sad :(
It is amazing how easily our pets become part of our family. And we mourn them like family. I dread the day.

Michelle said...

I am so sorry you have been through all of this. Kitties are truly furry children, and they hold a big piece of our hearts. I am so sorry for your loss and just have to say that I am amazed how much your Tiger looks like my Julio.....kinda took my breath away....

Coffee Slut said...

Beautiful post. I am sorry for your loss(es).
I found you through MckMama ...love your blog and am now following you!